*This is the article I was beginning to write as this year's Mother's Day post.
I became a Mom early one morning in December 2007. It was the scariest morning. I didn't sleep a wink the night before. I had a scheduled c-section and was told to be at the hospital at 5am to prep for the operation. I cried when I heard my baby for the first time... I hadn't yet laid eyes on her, but I could hear her. When the doc held her up over the blue sterile curtain, I could see only her little hands. I fell completely in love instantly. --- Although I believe I may have had a bit of post-pardum depression. I realized this when it took me a few days before I would have killed to protect her.
Fast forward 2 years.
Buddy was different. We had a scheduled c-section for him also. It was on the calendar for February 2010. But he decided to join our family in the middle of January.
I was terrified - this time for different reasons. With Rea, the fear was of the unknown, hoping all would go according to plan, just being scared about the surgery in general. Nothing super specific. But because Buddy was nearly 6 weeks early, I was terrified about his health, his chances, his life. When I was at the hospital for Rea, my fears were selfish. My fears were centered on me. Two years of being a Mom had shifted my focus. I wasn't thinking about me. I was a nervous wreck for the tiny human I hadn't even met yet.
I'm not going to get into Buddy's birth, if you want to read about it, click here.
This is not about Buddy. Well, not him alone.
I am in love with both of my monsters. They are so incredible. They are the coolest kids I know. And I think they are on their way to being pretty rad grown ups. I really am grateful to be their Momma.